Copyright 2000 -- Robert Baer Jr. Otto & Sam -- "Cruisin' for Trouble -- Part 1" DISCLAIMER Road Rovers characters, names, situations and the Road Rovers universe are the property of Warner Bros. I, nor this script/story are connected with Warner Bros. in any way, shape or form. This document may not be publicized or reproduced in any way, shape or form. It must remain fully intact and may not be altered in anyway. It is strictly used for not-for-profit entertainment purposes only, and is not intended to infringe on any Copyrights. This story is written by Robert Baer Jr and the characters Otto, Samantha Maddog, Princess and the Gila Monster are all Robert Baer Jr's creations, copyright 1997-1999. Boomerang is a creation of Robert Page. No36s and Alice Kiddman are creations of Brandon P. Author's Note: In Brandon P's fanfics, Colleen is dating Alice Kiddman. This story is being written with that premise in mind. Otto & Sam -- "Cruisin' For Trouble" The scene is a huge port in San Diego, the huge cruise ship the 'Pacific Queen' is almost ready to disembark for a week long cruise. Otto, Samantha Maddog, No36s, Alice Kiddman, Boomerang, Princess and the Gila Monster (all dressed in causal shirts and shorts) walk about the gangplank of the ship. They are quickly surrounded by adoring fans. The group is soon busy signing autographs. OTTO (sternly): If would appear that the success of our first CD has made us somewhat popular NO36S (smiling): Somewhat? Hey big guy, let's face it, the fans LOVE us! SAMANTHA (nods): It's true, Mr No36s, sir! That's why our agent got us this weekend gig on this cruise ship! BOOMERANG (smiles): It's a good thing the Master let all of us have the weekend off! ALICE (sadly): Too bad that Colleen had to stay behind. PRINCESS (smiles): They're even asking ME for autographs, and I'm not even a part of the group! GILA MONSTER (looks at Princess): We is here to help with the instruments, and keeps an eye on them! PRINCESS (looks at Gila): Do you think that Parvo or Storm would try to get them? GILA MONSTER (looks all around): Let's just say I'm gonna keep my eyes open! FAN (looks up at Gila): Hey mister, please take your mask off GILA MONSTER (snorts): You FIRST, twerp! PRINCESS (shocked): GILA! That wasn't nice! (turns to fan): sorry, but that's his real face! FAN (laughs): Man your ugly! GILA MONSTER (stares at him): And I'm MEAN TOO!!! The Gila opens his mouth wide and roars at the fan, who runs away in fright. PRINCESS (upset): Gila! I'm surprised at you! GILA MONSTER (defense): But that gooberoo called me ugly! At least I didn't part his hair with my 2 x 4! PRINCESS (rolls eyes): Yeah...right..... OTTO (shouting): Please, everyone! We must report to the captain now! But Otto's announcement makes the crowd of people move in even closer around them. SAMANTHA (panics): Oh NO!! What are we going to do! Otto uses his internal circuitry to instantly teleport the seven to the bridge of the ship. They arrive with a loud BOOM!!!! nearly scaring the bridge crew half to death. They all jump except the captain, who is now wearing a bright smile. CAPTAIN (happy): Welcome aboard my ship! Otto, Sam, Gila, don't you remember me? SAMANTHA (smiles, nods): YES!! I DO!! OTTO (sternly): You are Captain Finis Acrab! You were the Captain of the Mystic Mermaid cruise vessel last year in the Altlantic Ocean ... CAPTAIN (wide grin); And your Renegade Team saved our ship! Where's Starlight and your human masters? SAMANTHA (sadly): They couldn't make it, Captain Acrab, sir! GILA MONSTER (smiles): I wants you to meet my girlfriend, Princess! CAPTAIN (smiles): And a very fine looking lass you are, Miss Princess! PRINCESS (smiles): Why, thank you, Captain! OTTO (points): Captain Acrab, please meet the other members of our group! This is No36s, Alice Kiddman and Boomerang! CAPTAIN (smiles): A real pleasure! Would you all PLEASE sign my autograph book! (shows them his CD Walkman): I listen to your CD all the time! BOOMERANG (smiles): Thank you, Captain! CAPTAIN (smiles): You're all quite welcome! Our porters have brought all of your luggage and instruments on board. OTTO (sternly): Captain Acrab, according to your ship's computer, you have only reserved two cabins for us. A large stateroom and an adjoining smaller cabin. CAPTAIN (upset): Impossible! Your group requested seperate rooms! I'm sure there's been some sort of mistake (checks monitor): Oh dear... you're right, old friend! And all of the other cabins on board are occuppied! BOOMERANG (angry): HEY! NO36S (upset): That bites, man! PRINCESS (distressed): What does that mean? What will we do? OTTO (sternly): We will have to make the best of the situation. The female members of our party can take one room, the male members will sleep in the other room. ALICE (looks at the Gila): We have to sleep with lizard man? GILA MONSTER (angry): HEY! SAMANTHA (stands between Alice and Gila): Please, let's not fight. Remember why we're here! BOOMERANG (smiles): Yeah.... BABES!!!!!!!!!! OTTO (shakes head): We are here to perform our music! ALICE (nods): Works for me! NO36S (nods): Ok, it won't be too bad... CAPTAIN (smiles): I'm happy you're taking the news so well. This cruise had been sold out for weeks after we signed your group to perform! PRINCESS (smiles): Let's get settled in! I want to go shopping! CAPTAIN (smiles): Wait until we make our stopover at Cancun! They have excellent shopping there! BOOMERANG (smiles): And BABES!!!!!!!! SAMANTHA (shakes head): One track mind.... OTTO (smiles): Thank you, Captain Acrab! We will be going now! CAPTAIN (happy): And don't forget, you'll all be eating at MY table at dinner tonight! PRINCESS (happy): WOW!! This is SO exciting! NO36S (happy): I wanna get some time in at the pool! ALICE (happy): Let's go! The Pacific Queen has left port. It is now mid afternoon. Samantha is sitting in a deck chair besides her husband. She is dressed in a yellow one piece swimsuit while Otto is wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt and khaki shorts. The Gila Monster and Princess are in deck chairs beside them. Princess is wearing a blue bikini while the Gila is dressed in his leather jacket, white tee shirt and cut off jeans. Boomerang, No36s and Alice are walking the deck and watching all the people swimming, playing shuffleboard and relaxing. All three are wearing swimming trunks. NO36S (smiles): Smell that fresh ocean air! ALICE (sadly): I miss Colleen.... (looks around): I wish she could've came! BOOMERANG (laughs): But look all around! BABES!!! NO36S (shakes head): Is that ALL your mind is on? BOOMERANG (nods): YUP! ALICE (points): It looks like we're about to be mobbed! Alice points as a large group of fans rush towards them, some holding things to autograph, others just wanting to get close to the singing rock stars. The three happily begin signing autographs. ALICE (smiles): We'll have to get used to this! NO36S (nods): I got no problem with that! BOOMERANG (poses): HELLO, LADIES!!!!!!!!! Meanwhile a security officer approaches the Gila Monster and Princess. OFFICER (sternly): Sir, I must ask you to relinquish your weapon! GILA MONSTER (confused): What weapon? OFFICER (points): That object! GILA MONSTER (smiles): You means my 2 x 4! OFFICER (nods): That's right! No weapons allowed on board! GILA MONSTER (grunts): This ain't no weapon, it's a hearing aid! OFFICER (confused): A hearing aid? GILA MONSTER (nods): Yep! Folks listen to me a LOT better when I carry it! OFFICER (upset): It's a weapon, give it to me now! GILA MONSTER (wide grin): You SURE you want me to give it to ya? OFFICER (angry): LET ME HAVE IT! GILA MONSTER (grins): Be careful what you wish for! As the Gila swings his 2 x 4 towards the officer, suddenly it has vanished from his hand. GILA MONSTER (confused): What the..... (looks at Princess): HEY!! That's mine! PRINCESS (sternly): I won't let you harm anyone. That's why I stopped time long enough to take it away from you! OFFICER (confused): Er...ok, ma'am, hand over that weapon, please.. PRINCESS (smiles): It's not a weapon, sir, it's a hunk of wood and ... OFFICER (furious): And I'm going to toss it into the ocean! GILA MONSTER (furious, stands up) You do and I'll throw you into the ocean after it, you dingledoof! OFFICER (screaming): That does it! I'm escorting BOTH of you to the brig! Maybe you two belong in the cargo hold, with the rest of the dumb animals! GILA MONSTER (screaming): OVER MY DEAD BODY, TWERP! PRINCESS (stands up): Hey, we're part of the band's .... OFFICER (screaming): Yeah, RIGHT! To the brig with you! PRINCESS (looks over behind the Officer): Hello, Captain Acrab! CAPTAIN (looks at Officer): Is there some sort of problem here? OFFICER (points): The man in the monster costume won't give up his weapon! They claim to be with the band and ... CAPTAIN (upset): They ARE a part of the band! They are MY PERSONAL FRIENDS! OFFICER (shocked): They are? (stuttering): I....I....I .. had no idea.... GILA MONSTER (laughs): This doofus ain't got a clue, does he, Captain? CAPTAIN (stenly): No he doesn't! Come with me, we're going to have a LONG talk! OFFICER (scared): But...Captain! I'm the Chief of Security! CAPTAIN (shakes head): Not any more! I'm assigning you NEW duties, as sanitation officer! The Gila Monster giggles as he watches the Captain take the Officer away. GILA MONSTER (laughs, turns to Princess): Serves the little dweeb right! I'm gonna take a swim, you commin? PRINCESS (shakes head): No, I wanna just lay here for a while longer, you go ahead! The Gila Monster jumps into the pool, people in the pool see him and run away, terrified. Boomerang breaks away from the crowd long enough to sit beside Princess. BOOMERANG (looks at her): Princess, may I ask you a question? PRINCESS (nods): Sure, go ahead! BOOMERANG (confused): What do you see in that overgrown lizard? You're a hot lookin' canine! He's not even the right....well.... species! PRINCESS (defensive): I love him, Boomerang. He's the first man to ever care about me! None of those goons in the Lost Pack ever did. BOOMERANG (pleading): But he's a reptile! He doesn't even have fur! He's MAJOR ugly and, no offense, but he's about as intelligent as plant food! PRINCESS (upset, sits up): Stop it! I won't hear any more insulting words about my man! I love him! He loves me! As a favor to you, I'll pretend we never had this conversation! Princess leaves her deck chair and join her boyfriend in the now empty pool. After the crowd leaves them, Alice is still looking over the railing over the horizon. No36s comes running over to him. NO36S (excited): C'mon, Alice! Let's take a dip in the pool! That ugly lizard man scared all the humans away and .... (puts hand on his shoulder): You're still thinking about Colleen, aren't you? ALICE (nods): This cruise would be SO much better if she was here. NO36S (smiles): Hey, maybe a dive into the pool will get your mind off of her... ALICE (shakes head): I doubt it man, look over there at Otto and Samantha. She looks SO much like Colleen, every time I see her, it just reminds me .... NO36S (smiles): Cheer up, Alice! We're on a cruise! Relax! Alice nods and joins No36s and the others in the pool. Otto and Samantha play a game of shuffleboard. SAMANTHA (smiles): Looks like my pucks have yours trapped, dear! OTTO (sizes up shot): Not quite, Samantha. Based on the principle of applied physics and by my exact calculations, this next shot of mine will eliminate your pucks from the gameboard thus enabling me to score higher. Otto pushes his puck, but the ship takes a sudden shift, causing him to put too much 'force' behind it. The puck carams into the other pucks on the board, sending them in all directions along the deck. A waiter steps on one and spills his tray of drinks into a row of passengers laying in lounge chairs. The lifeguard at the pool is struck by one in her ankle and falls into the pool. Yet another puck slides over in the direction of a group of caterers, who are carrying a huge four tiered white cake in their hands. One of the caterers steps on the puck and falls down, causing the huge cake to tumble to the deck on top of him. OTTO (sadly): It would appear that my calculations were in error.... SAMANTHA (nods): That's an understatement. The scene in now evening on the cruise ship. The group is seated at the Captain's table and enjoying an elegant dinner. Even the Gila Monster is on his best behavior, showing good table manners. OTTO (looks at the Captain): Captain Acrab, this Filet Mignon is quite delicious! My compliments to your chef! SAMANTHA (nods): I agree, Captain Acrab, sir! CAPTAIN (smiles): Why, thank you, Otto! And Sam, you don't have to call me sir, ok? SAMANTHA (nods): Yes sir... oops, I did it again.... sorry.... GILA MONSTER (smiles): I don't about that flying minion yous guys is talkin about, but this meat with the bacon wrapped around it a mighty tasty! PRINCESS (giggles): That IS Filet Mignon, dear! GILA MONSTER (nods): OH! COOL!!! Hey Captain, y'all got a plate of fried chicken to go with this? CAPTAIN (smiles): For you, old friend, anything you want! BOOMERANG (smiles): Hey Alice, I got the cabin number of that lifeguard that fell in the pool. Turns out she has two roommates, you and me and No36s could see them after rehearsal tonight and .... Alice? ALICE (sighs): I miss Colleen! You guys go on without me.... NO36S (sadly): Man, you gotta snap out of this, Alice! This cruise will be over in a week and .... ALICE (sadly): Thanks for reminding me... BOOMERANG (nods): You think Hunter's going to make a play for her while you're away? ALICE (growls): HUNTER! He broke up with her long ago, he needs to leave her alone now! SAMANTHA (smiles): It's alright, Mr Kiddman, sir. Please don't be worried. OTTO (sternly): Remember everyone, following dinner he must rehearse. We will be performing tommorrow night! CAPTAIN (happy): And that's one preformance I truly look forward to! May I sit in on the rehearsal session, Otto? OTTO (nods): Ok, you can, Captain Acrab, but no one else. We need privacy to go over our songs and musical compositions. The scene is now around midnight in front of the Rover's quarters. Rehearsal went well, No36s and Boomerang have returned from their dates, and everyone is getting ready to 'turn in' for the night. SAMANTHA (smiles): See you in the morning, darling! OTTO (smiles): Goodnight, my love! Otto and Samantha kiss as they go to their separate quarters, Princess and the Glia Monster also kiss goodnight as they part. In the 'guys' room, there are three cots. NO36S (turns to Otto): How's this going to work? There's five of us and only three beds! BOOMERANG (nods): Yeah! How are we going to do this? OTTO (sternly): It is quite simple. Since the Gila Monster always sleeps in a chair and I can rest comfortably on the floor, you three will occupy the beds! ALICE (nods): Sounds fair! BOOMERANG (smiles): Works for me! NO36S (nods): I got the top bunk! OTTO (sternly): Now that this matter has been resolved, shall we prepare for sleep mode? GILA MONSTER (laughs): Sleep mode! Soon all five guys are in their pajamas and attempting to sleep. While Otto is asleep on the floor, the others are wide awake due to the Gila Monster's loud snoring. ALICE (growls): He sounds like a continuous chain saw! NO36S (shakes head): More like a busy airport runway! BOOMERANG (growls): This bites! It's already one in the morning! Guys, we gotta do something! ALICE (evil grin): Are you thinking what I'm thinking? No36s and Boomerang nod. The three of them carefully carry the snoring Gila Monster in his chair out the front door and leave him on the deck. ALICE (closes door): There! Now he can keep the whales awake! NO36S (nods): Yeah! BOOMERANG (laughs): I just thought of something, what if it rains? All three of them look at each other, and then giggle as they climb back into their beds. As the other Rovers sleep, four hooded figures dressed in black find the Gila Monster on the deck, they carry him away to the ship's engine room. He awakens to find himself chained to one of the walls as the hooded figures stand around him. One of the figures speaks to him. FIGURE (deep voice): Ok, lizard, spill it! Tell us what we want to know, or you'll become a matching set of luggage! -------------------------------------------------------------------------- to be continued.....